Bobby Flay

Let's talk about someone I hate

BOBBY FLAY

WHAT A DOUCHE AMIRITE

No seriously

AUUGGHHH

IT BURNSSS SO HIDEOUS

Garlic is to Vampires as Bobby Flay is to Me
Kryptonite is to Superman as Bobby Flay is to Me
Quality Programming is to ABC Family as Bobby Flay is to Me

Look at his little douche hipster chef scarf that he's half-assedly wearing in that picture. Over a suit and tie!? What is that even.

Jesus he looks the child of a chipmunk and a burnt omelet. 

There was a time in my life when I didn't have this terrible burning rage for Bobby Flay.

I just thought he was one of the many douchebags that are always floating around. You find them on television a lot, actually.

But goddamn! Have you seen Throwdown with Bobby Flay? Talk about the most conceited show ever.

"HELLO YES MY NAME IS BOBBY FLAY CERTAINLY YOU HAVE HEARD OF IT I AM QUITE FAMOUS. BUT HM MAYBE NOT ENOUGH YET PEOPLE KNOW WHO I AM. I SHOULD ADD A TWENTIETH SHOW TO MY ROSTER. PERHAPS I WILL DO ONE WHERE I FIND HOMEGROWN AMERICANS, YES, PERHAPS PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT PROFESSIONALLY TRAINED, RESTAURANT-RUNNING CHEFS (IT IS SAD THAT PEOPLE LIKE THAT EXIST), PEOPLE WHO HAVE ONLY ONE SMALL CLAIM TO FAME - A FAMILY RECIPE, PERHAPS, OR THAT ONE DISH THAT THEY HAVE PERFECTED AND THAT BRINGS THE COMMUNITY TOGETHER. YES I WILL FIND THESE PEOPLE AND THEN I WILL CRUSH THEM. I MEAN CHALLENGE THEM. JUST A WHOLESOME FOOD CHALLENGE. TO SHOW THAT BOBBY FLAY IS THE BEST THAT EVERYONE IS GOOD AT SOMETHING. but not as good as me."

God.

When will the mothership claim him.